Tuesday, October 23, 2012

another rant.. this one more narcolepsy related

So... body hasn't been working quite right, and i've been able to predict the rain accurately on mult days when the weatherman says otherwise Lol.. but nothing new really, just more of the same. My sleep issues on the otherhand.... Awesome new sleep doc gave me Nuvgil to try (wanting to try something else besides adderall that ive been on for 2 1/2 yrs)... 150mg didn't do anything, so we tried 250mg... and it barely works.. plus I get occasional really bad headaches, and stomach upset issues (nausea/heartburn/bloated feeling sometimes.. not everytime but more often than not.) And its suppose to be "once a day" deal, but what little effects i do feel- wear off within 5 or 6 hours. Have a call into the doc about it but he is out of the office till wednesday.. thought about filling the next script anyway but then today.. Sunday i forced myself to KEEP MOVING all day so i could spend it with the youngest.. we made homemade rocky road ice cream, went through craft stuff, watched a movie, made popcorn etc.. had a good long day with her. At the end of it though, physically I was freakin hurting with lots of new knots cuz i pushed myself too hard.. but it was worth it. Soo.. So I slept all night. got the kid off to school at the last min (after hitting snooze for 45min in my sleep), then messed with the new hermit crab tank and looked crap up online and did slightly productive stuff... then got extra crazy super tired, so I took a nuvigil at 2pm, set my alarms for 4-430p (when the youngest gets home) and passed out.... next thing I know, its 8pm and I'm getting a call from the fiance... i slept through the kids knocking on the door a couple times, 6 txt messages and a few phone calls and of course all my alarms... its expensive...and it doesn't freaking work!! Thankgod the oldest is 14 and she heated up some chilli for them for dinner.. ticks me off soo badly sometimes.. I made food for me and the fiance when he got home from school and i spent the whole time talkin about all the crap i have to do and need to do and yet i'm so freaking tired still... he told me to take tonight off, he would build a fire, i need to stop worrying and stop stressing and relax "doctors orders" maybe watch one of my TV shows i'm a few weeks behind on.. lol...hard to do when i have so much i need to do and only one more night off work... but its also hard to do anything when i'm so tired.. When I talk to the doc and we try something else, i might ask for more adderall.. to have on the side in case whatever new drug or dose or whatever doesn't work.. (adderall works, but i get horrible horrible dry mouth so bad i get exploding taste buds all over if i take it more than a couple days, and i have NO sex drive..at all... ) But at least it works to wake me up! Sorry.. i'm trying not to bitch outloud about it all too much but its so frustrating. Fiance has been back to school this fall, so now I'm basically doing it all with the kids (technically "his" kids, the oldest has been living with us for like.. 5 months, and we've had the 7 yr old for almost 2 yrs..which is great, they are awesome.. but it makes me feel that much more guilty and stressed when i can't do what needs to be done)

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