I need to sleep.. I don't know why im not asleep. i think partly, my body has been excited about actually like, sleeping when im spose to this last week for the most part. (and not having to screw things up with PT and not working 40 hrs a wk for the first time.. did 32 hrs instead). but i haven't been very good about keeping up with my PT cuz of my stomach feeling like crap. and me being lazy.
my left shoulder is.. i dont know. It just has this feeling thats telling me its not sitting where its suppose to, and i feel this irresistible urg to wiggle it around and move it and push it back and fourth tryin to relieve that feeling.. - its like my left shoulder has suddenly developed "restless shoulder syndrome.' - like 20x more obnoxious than it use to when itd get relieve by me pushing it around.
I did all my upper body PT this morning.. and now it feels like maybe i strained a muscle or ligament or something in that stupid left shoulder on top of the irritating feeling that still wont go away.. grr. feels like i have a spasm developing now.. great. lol like thats really gunna help things. stupid body.
k gunna go try to go back to sleep.. my pretty dark blue-with-silver-swirls couch is going away today =( im a bit bummed about it, even if it was ultimately my choice... the boyfriend wanted a different couch, ive sorta beat the hell out of this one in the last 2 1/2 years, and it shows cat hair like you wouldn't believe.... and my best friend is getting rid of her nice couch....and i had a friend who HAPPEND to be on vacation near where my best friend is, and offered to drive their trailer down and bring the couch up..... =) And haul my couch away and donate it to a friend of hers with a baby and a hubby and a totally barren apartment.. So.. alas.. im upgrading. but i'm still sad.. I should post a pic of it, in memory of next time..haha
k really. i need sleep. and i dont know how much sleep i'll get these next couple of days... AND there is a nationally shortage of the drug I use to keep me awake when the narcolepsy gets worse.. so I cant get any more of the extended release adderall for who knows how long..and ive already dwindled my emergency month supply down (because i havent been able to get it all month already =( sooo... dont wanna squander them on something thats my own damn fault, instead of using them when i REALLY need them and i cant keep awake otherwise.
hmph.
okay shoulder, u can stop now. really....
Monday, March 21, 2011
Friday, March 18, 2011
tummy hurts..
my stomach is ticked off at me =( Its sorta doing what it does every so often when I can't eat wheat/gluten for awhile.. though I didn't have very much this time. And it was a long time ago now.. but it wont stop. It felt a little better for a short while, enough to goto sleep.. but now im awake (woke up every hr for the last 3 hrs) and it hurts and is all bloated and full of gas.. bloody hate this! I think i have some gas-ex pills around somewhere..
i have work tonight and really wanna sleep more.
hmph =(
i have work tonight and really wanna sleep more.
hmph =(
Tuesday, March 15, 2011
Nearing the end of PT
Well, apparently I've come a long way in the last couple of months. My bursitis is all but gone, they finally showed me how to put my SI back in place, I'm sleeping better. Shoulders are still pretty lax and I gotta shove em back In a few times a day but I can sleep on my side fully supported w my pillows and don't have that irritating feeling in the joint that tells me its shifted too far forward or back right when i try to sleep anymore. It's getting spendy too so I was Gunna talk to them about releasing me or cutting it Down.
But I was due for my monthly prog note so worked well :) the guy I like more did it this time and he said muscle wise I'm pretty dang strong now. Since my pain has significantly gone down the last 2 wks, he doesn't wanna cut me loose yet but we decided to do once a week for the next month and then call it good. They also have an "alumni program" which means I can come work out here whenever I want to or if i start having issues w something I can drop in and they will tell me what to do. Or if I can't get my SI back, they'd see which way it's rotated and fix it for me :) pleased about all that. :)
I just gotta keep up w my stuff at home. It's harder to remember when I'm not actively hurting as much lol. Still pretty aleve dependent but haven't needed to supplement w the advil as much. Need to remember to regularly ice stuff too, they pointed out the whole..end of the inflammatory process which is the laydown of scar tissue...which I have a lot of in my hip joints..they said it's probably another attempt to try and hold me together.
Oh and I need to get this super heavy duty brace for my knees.. So my patella is held in place better. For a few weeks they were taping them and Woa it felt so so much better..my knees don't usually hurt but I felt so much more stable!! He said my knees were "loosey goosey" lol I didn't realize how I automatically adjusted how I walk and move to prevent my knees from moving certain ways and causing twinges of pain that I well, never realized was there till it was gone lol :-) so I want the braces to wear when I work and walk a lot.
K gotta get some sleep before work tonight..I made homemade chili and corn bread last night, wasn't the best but was pretty tasty :-) hope Ppl are staying together. :)
But I was due for my monthly prog note so worked well :) the guy I like more did it this time and he said muscle wise I'm pretty dang strong now. Since my pain has significantly gone down the last 2 wks, he doesn't wanna cut me loose yet but we decided to do once a week for the next month and then call it good. They also have an "alumni program" which means I can come work out here whenever I want to or if i start having issues w something I can drop in and they will tell me what to do. Or if I can't get my SI back, they'd see which way it's rotated and fix it for me :) pleased about all that. :)
I just gotta keep up w my stuff at home. It's harder to remember when I'm not actively hurting as much lol. Still pretty aleve dependent but haven't needed to supplement w the advil as much. Need to remember to regularly ice stuff too, they pointed out the whole..end of the inflammatory process which is the laydown of scar tissue...which I have a lot of in my hip joints..they said it's probably another attempt to try and hold me together.
Oh and I need to get this super heavy duty brace for my knees.. So my patella is held in place better. For a few weeks they were taping them and Woa it felt so so much better..my knees don't usually hurt but I felt so much more stable!! He said my knees were "loosey goosey" lol I didn't realize how I automatically adjusted how I walk and move to prevent my knees from moving certain ways and causing twinges of pain that I well, never realized was there till it was gone lol :-) so I want the braces to wear when I work and walk a lot.
K gotta get some sleep before work tonight..I made homemade chili and corn bread last night, wasn't the best but was pretty tasty :-) hope Ppl are staying together. :)
Thursday, March 3, 2011
wee... busy busy times.
Well, holy crap work has been insane the last few weeks... this is my 3rd week of working 40+ hours.. I'll actually be working 48 this week somehow..
With all this work, its really hard to feel motivated/have energy to do my PT =( My bursitis had basically become a thing of the past till the last couple of days. Its not bad but its definitely starting again. Last PT session my IT band on the left was super tight again... had to use the stupid foam roller. i hate that thing. it hurts. And i have this massive muscle knot in my lower back on the right, can't seem to work it out to save my life.
I had my little "check up" session with the main PT guy, who i don't even really work with anymore. He irritates me. I decided I don't like him afterall. He started me doing this one exercise to help my "core" and i did a similar one back when I did PT before but I started out a bit slower.. He told me to go faster, but to stop if i can't keep it balanced (lifting each leg off the floor, keeping my lower back pressed to the floor against a towel and not letting my hips/abs shift from side to side at all), and said its not even worth it to keep going with the same leg if i cant keep it even.....and I told him I can't tell based on what hes telling me/seeing if im keeping it even or not, I can't tell. (My old PT used biofeedback w/ a blood pressure cuff all pumped up behind me, and i had to keep the dial even as possible till I could finally a) develop the muscle tone i needed and b) know what im spose to be feeling... - what does this guy do? :
"Your not in tune with your body at all. You need to be able to do them faster because otherwise u wont do them and u need to be able to do them right. Thats a problem. Just like when I ask you how bad your pain is, you don't give me a straight number, u say "2-4" - so is it 1, 3 or 4?"
what the heck dood. No, I'm not in tune with my muscles or joints. My joints do what the hell they want to, how am i suppose to keep track of them? And... if i knew what my body was doing, I wouldn't freaking be here. And painwise, it varies GREATLY depending on the day, what I'm doing, what the weather is doing etc.. so u get a "Average Range"
grrr... that really really irked me.
I ended up not doing those ones that weekend cuz i really didn't know what i was suppose to be doing AT ALL.. then the next i think friday or so, the other PT guy I really like explained it very simply for me, and when I told him I cant tell if the hold is breaking, he told me to use my hands behind my back instead of the stupid rolled up towel so I can actually FEEL the muscles on each side. POOF! I can figure it out now!
I read this thing on this physio message board about how people with EDS shouldn't stretch out their tight hamstrings, cuz its usually "the only thing keeping their knees from subluxating" - thought that was interesting...
I have 2 whole stretches im suppose to do.
He decreased my exercises finally, so its back to taking 2 hours now, instead of 2 1/2 to 3 hrs. thankgod.
I have all these cuts on my finger tips, its irritating the hell out of me. HEAL ALREADY! And i jammed my finger between a drawer and cabnet door that didnt open and it sheared off an inch of skin on my middle finger.. and that sucker needs to hurry up and heal dangit. It hurts and i do NOT like having open cuts on my hands when I'm working.. too many extra nasty bacterias floating around a hospital. - Ive been keeping it covered w/ a bandaid, and then covering that with the op-site/tegaderm we use to cover IV's, cuz it keeps it waterproof about half the night. tryin to leave it open at home to air out but i keep bumping it or accidentally rubbing it and it opens again.
gah =( stupid cuts. I hate the slow healing thing. its annoying.
Ack, gotta get ready for work... did not sleep enough today, boyfriend kept me up. (kept us both up but we did elect to eat the pulled bbq pork sandwiches i made, that was tasty =) (homemade bbq sauce, pork loin in the crock pot). mm..
must stay awake.
K, off I go. dang i need to remember to make a dentist appt.. oof.
With all this work, its really hard to feel motivated/have energy to do my PT =( My bursitis had basically become a thing of the past till the last couple of days. Its not bad but its definitely starting again. Last PT session my IT band on the left was super tight again... had to use the stupid foam roller. i hate that thing. it hurts. And i have this massive muscle knot in my lower back on the right, can't seem to work it out to save my life.
I had my little "check up" session with the main PT guy, who i don't even really work with anymore. He irritates me. I decided I don't like him afterall. He started me doing this one exercise to help my "core" and i did a similar one back when I did PT before but I started out a bit slower.. He told me to go faster, but to stop if i can't keep it balanced (lifting each leg off the floor, keeping my lower back pressed to the floor against a towel and not letting my hips/abs shift from side to side at all), and said its not even worth it to keep going with the same leg if i cant keep it even.....and I told him I can't tell based on what hes telling me/seeing if im keeping it even or not, I can't tell. (My old PT used biofeedback w/ a blood pressure cuff all pumped up behind me, and i had to keep the dial even as possible till I could finally a) develop the muscle tone i needed and b) know what im spose to be feeling... - what does this guy do? :
"Your not in tune with your body at all. You need to be able to do them faster because otherwise u wont do them and u need to be able to do them right. Thats a problem. Just like when I ask you how bad your pain is, you don't give me a straight number, u say "2-4" - so is it 1, 3 or 4?"
what the heck dood. No, I'm not in tune with my muscles or joints. My joints do what the hell they want to, how am i suppose to keep track of them? And... if i knew what my body was doing, I wouldn't freaking be here. And painwise, it varies GREATLY depending on the day, what I'm doing, what the weather is doing etc.. so u get a "Average Range"
grrr... that really really irked me.
I ended up not doing those ones that weekend cuz i really didn't know what i was suppose to be doing AT ALL.. then the next i think friday or so, the other PT guy I really like explained it very simply for me, and when I told him I cant tell if the hold is breaking, he told me to use my hands behind my back instead of the stupid rolled up towel so I can actually FEEL the muscles on each side. POOF! I can figure it out now!
I read this thing on this physio message board about how people with EDS shouldn't stretch out their tight hamstrings, cuz its usually "the only thing keeping their knees from subluxating" - thought that was interesting...
I have 2 whole stretches im suppose to do.
He decreased my exercises finally, so its back to taking 2 hours now, instead of 2 1/2 to 3 hrs. thankgod.
I have all these cuts on my finger tips, its irritating the hell out of me. HEAL ALREADY! And i jammed my finger between a drawer and cabnet door that didnt open and it sheared off an inch of skin on my middle finger.. and that sucker needs to hurry up and heal dangit. It hurts and i do NOT like having open cuts on my hands when I'm working.. too many extra nasty bacterias floating around a hospital. - Ive been keeping it covered w/ a bandaid, and then covering that with the op-site/tegaderm we use to cover IV's, cuz it keeps it waterproof about half the night. tryin to leave it open at home to air out but i keep bumping it or accidentally rubbing it and it opens again.
gah =( stupid cuts. I hate the slow healing thing. its annoying.
Ack, gotta get ready for work... did not sleep enough today, boyfriend kept me up. (kept us both up but we did elect to eat the pulled bbq pork sandwiches i made, that was tasty =) (homemade bbq sauce, pork loin in the crock pot). mm..
must stay awake.
K, off I go. dang i need to remember to make a dentist appt.. oof.
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